Posts Tagged "Personal"

Todd Skidmore pulled out the win with his design.  Heather and I, independent of each other, chose his design as the best.  The contest was close between four participants, but I liked that Todd made the laces hot pink.  Hot pink in the laces will allow me to replace them with black after the wedding.  Rolling to the gym with too much hot pink might look a little funny on me.

While I did get some cool new kicks out of the contest for my wedding, I was interested to see the viral effects of the contest.  Overall, I was very pleased with the results.  The contest ran from March 9th to March 31st.  Here are some stats from the contest:

-Over 1,500 hits to my site
-Almost 1,000 unique visits
-Over 20 user-generated submissions
-Trackbacks to multiple shoe blogs
-Twitter helped push my blog up to readers in Beaverton, OR (Nike HQ)

Todd Skidmore OFFDAMKT

I learned a great deal about how users interact online.  However, there are several things that I would have done differently next time.

1) Make it easier to submit designs.  The process did cause more problems than I expected.  It would’ve been easier to have the users email their designs to me.
2) I wish more public commentary on the design had ensued.  I was disappointed with this aspect of the contest.
3) Get more people that bleed Nike to participate.

Thanks so much to everyone that participated in any form! If you tweeted the post, created an entry or simply left a comment about what you liked, I really appreciate you helping me have fun on my big day!  It’s going to be fun!

The response to my Nike Shox Wedding Contest and your chance to win $50 has been pretty impressive so far.

The Back-story…

About 6 months ago while discussing wedding plans with my fiancée, I tried to convince her that my groomsmen and I should be able to wear customized Nike Shox as our shoes for the wedding.  Somewhat of a debate ensued.

“It will look horrible!” she playfully exclaimed.
“Jerry Seinfeld did it!” I anxiously responded.
“You’re not him!” she responded as if she were my mother.
“I’ll make sure all the Shox match the vests.”
“No, it the worst idea ever!” she exclaimed in her customary, enthusiastic and playful 5-year old like pitch.

At that point, I proceeded to work on her friends, thinking that she might seriously consider it if it had some strong XX chromosome backing.  Outside of one that works for an ad agency, the idea never picked up steam; but I did manage to help the girls burn off lots of calories through laughing.

Fast Forward…

Two weekends ago, my fiancée informed me that she had spent $300 on her wedding shoes.

blue-manolos

And of course, being made up of XX chromosomes, she can’t help but brag about the “deal” she received, especially since the deal is related to shoes.   This price phenomenon is one of those female conversation starters that I’ve never quite figured out, and I consider my female knowledge slightly above average.  Anyway, she saved some $600 on the “Something Blue” Manolo Blahniks that Carrie Bradshaw wears in the Sex and the City Movie.  If I was a girl, I would have jumped up, hugged her, hit her with a pillow, kissed her and then started to…well, you know all that stuff that Cinemax says that women do when men aren’t around.  Unfortunately for both of us, the conversation took more of a logical approach.

“Wait! You get to wear blue shoes with your white (ivory) dress, but I can’t wear my NikeID Shox?” I asked with sarcastic inquiry.
“But, baby,” she said pleadingly.  “They’ll look terrible; and besides, no one will be able to see my shoes,” she said hesitantly as if she knew what my next move was.
“Then, whyyyyyy are we spending $300 on shoes that no one will see?” I responded in typical guy fashion I assume.
I then heard a voice from above whisper to me, “Well played sir.”

I’m not really sure what happened next because I think I mentally blacked out from my strategically placed response; but when I regained consciousness she was telling me about something old, something new, something borrowed, something blue.  The part about blue sounded made-up to me, but I didn’t care because she informed me that if I wanted to wear Nike Shox to the reception only then I could do so.  Victory!!  A series of questions ensued with the only stipulation being that she gets the final say-so.

The Result

After I declared victory, I told her that I would put my social media skills to the test to help choose the colors of my new shoes; thus, we now we have the Nike Shox Wedding Contest.   The goals of the contest are simply to illustrate how the various aspects of social media can be used to create a successful marketing campaign, show how easy it can be to create personal involvement in a brand movement, get people to use their creative talents and for me (and the groomsmen) to be comfortable on my wedding day.

Within 24 hours, I had hits on my site from over 10 countries and a few from Nike’s corporate headquarters.  The contest has a little over 2 weeks to go and there have already been 16 submissions.  So far, I like what I see, but I’d like to see some more questions to make the shoes as personal as possible.   I can’t wait to see what other submissions come forth.

Fine Print: Nike is not officially involved with this contest other than they’ve done their part to keep me as a customer for throughout my entire athletic career.  My fiancee is just simply awesome for letting me do this.

If you read my blog, then you know I’m a big fan of the Nike brand and their commercials.  They’ve been there with me through all my days as an athlete in soccer, basketball and football.  At all levels whether it was all-star teams or the powerhouse that is LSU football, I more often than not chose Nike gear.  I figured they ought to be with me on one of the most important days of my life too.

During my wedding reception (5.9.2009), I will need that extra confidence and bounce to make sure I can make it to each food station with ease as they unveil new dishes throughout the night, meet n’ greet my guests with grace and, more importantly, glide with elegance and style on the dance floor.  I will only be able to perform at my maximum in a set of Nike Shox.  Using this reasoning and my superb litigation skills, I convinced my fiancee to let me wear a pair of Nike Shox during the wedding reception!!

The best part: I’ve chosen the shoe, but YOU get to choose the style and have a chance to win $50!!!  It’s quite simple to compete and win, so here are the rules:

1)    Go to NIKEiD and design a pair of Nike Shox for me to wear at the wedding reception.

2)    The model has to be a running shoe, which are the “Turbo+ iD,” “Experience+ iD,” “ NZ iD” or the “Turbo+ VI iD.”

3)    Save the design to your Nike profile (aka “myLocker”), use the “share” feature at the bottom right to copy the hyperlink to the design and then comment on this post with your design and hyperlink for all to see.

4)    The winner, chosen by us, will receive a $50 Nike gift card!

5)    Pictures of the shoes in action will be posted upon return from the honeymoon.

You can read the backstory on this contest here.

clouvioffdamkt1

Considerations…

1)    My groomsmen and ring bearer will have the option to wear these shoes as well, so your design could be on eight pairs of feet!!

2)    Feel free to comment on the blog with questions or check here regarding anything about the wedding so you can better tailor your design. e.g. What are your colors?

3)    Feel free to email me the wallpaper download, so I can put a copy in my Flickr Stream.

4)    This is a subjective contest, so if you like someone’s design, please leave a comment saying so.  It may influence the results.  Also, my wonderful fiancée gets the final say-so.

5)    Even if you’re not competing, pass along the link to this blog.  Increased competition yields better results.  That’s what Nike and I are all about.

6)    Feel free to ask me any questions about the NIKEiD site or this contest.  Contest ends when my bachelor party begins at Midnight EST on  April 1, 2009!!

I’ve given the short, short version several times to many people, but there is always a plethora (Three Amigos) of questions that ensue about the setup, espionage and deceit (necessary) that took place to make this magical event everlasting and memorable. Three months of planning and preparation went into the engagement night, so I’ve decided to break the entire story up into a few posts. In this post, I will give you the story about the night I asked Heather Platt to be my wife…I think that’s what I said to her.

Saturday, May 24, 2008

630PM – Heather and I left my parents house for dinner at one of my most favorite restaurants…Restaurant Cuvee on Magazine Street in downtown New Orleans. She had known about the dinner reservation for nearly two months as I told her that I was dying to go back since I hadn’t been back since before Katrina. When I asked her, she had no suspicions because we both love to try great restaurants.

At this point, I wasn’t nervous at all. I felt all the pieces were in place, so all that was left was the timing and execution.

At a traffic light outside the Superdome, I flashed a picture of Heather looking beautiful in her black dress. As she fiddled with the camera, I grazed my right hand across my left jacket pocket to make sure the two rings were still in there.

700PM – Dinner was served at Cuvee over a nice bottle of French red. Heather went for the filet marinated in bleu cheese served over a piece of prime rib. I had some sort of soft-shell crab that I wasn’t too impressed with largely because I felt it didn’t reflect its menu description. She polished off the filet but left the slab of prime rib. The conversation was light and interesting as always. Dinner was being served at a nice pace and the bottle of wine began to take our conversation off onto strange tangents. I wish I could say that I remember most of it, but my mind was heavily occupied with the two brilliant ovals in my left pocket.

I still wasn’t nervous. I kept reminding myself that she still had no idea what was coming, and I relaxed by listening to her childlike enthusiasm. Her vigor kept me at ease because I knew she would always be able to make me smile.

730PM – My family (Mom, Dad, Chenae, Chris, Caitlyn, Jacob (Caitlyn’s BF) and Heather’s parents were having dinner at Café Adelaide at the Lowe’s Hotel.

825PM – We ordered dessert and two cappuccinos. We weren’t really hungry, but she has a sweet tooth and I needed to kill about 15 more minutes. After we ordered, I excused myself to the restroom.

I was alone in the marble-lined restroom. I removed the two rings from the small jewelry bag in left pocket. I put her Grandmother’s ring in my right pocket beneath my money clip…the engagement ring into my left pocket beneath my Blackberry. I looked at myself in the mirror to make sure I was in order and then I repeated several times, “Old…right…new…left, old…right…new…left.”

840PM – We wrapped up dessert. I went to the restroom again because I actually had to go and had forgotten before. She then went, and I paid the bill.

845PM – On the way to the car, I suggested we go take a walk on the River until Kim and Paul (already in town) could meet us for drinks. It was a mild New Orleans night with that pinkish-blue sunset. It was turning out to be a nice night. She was excited to go for the walk because we had spent time in downtown New Orleans but rarely alone.

9PM – We walked out of the Hilton parking garage towards Spanish Plaza. I called Kim, strategically, on my cell phone to let her know where we should meet when she got downtown.

As I hung up the phone, we were about 50 yards from the River barricade. All of a sudden, I finally felt my heart rate increase rapidly. I knew my plan was to hold the older ring (missing the center stone) and act like I saw it on the ground. I had my hand in the correct pocket, but I couldn’t seem to shake it free from under my clip. Meanwhile, I was doing a poor job of playing it off as we were basically walking in miniature circles.

Heather quickly saved me and pointed out some ship doing something fast in the water.

“One question,” I asked myself as she spoke. “Are you ready for this?” “Yes,” I answered and quickly bent over on my right leg…

“Look at this baby,” I acted as though I’d just picked it up off the ground. She looked over curious and confused, and I handed her Grandmother’s ring to her.


I watched her face carefully for three seconds (felt like ten).

As soon as I saw the recognition of the ring in her eyes, I pulled the new ring out of my left pocket and dropped to one knee. Her initial reaction was confused as I could see she didn’t know if I was serious or not, but she soon realized I was serious as I began my speech with my right hand on her waist and my left clenching tightly to the ring. Her hands were resting on my shoulders. She burst into her tears for the first time. Her poor eyes were covered by the seemingly endless stream of joy. She later told me that all she initially saw of the ring was the sparkle because there was so much haze over her eyes.

My speech began with, “Heather…” and I honestly can’t tell you (neither can she) what I said after that. I know the points I wanted to make to her, and I did do that.

I ended with, “Heather, will you be my wife?”

“Yes!” she tried to scream out in a teary voice. I put my arms around her waist and hugged her tightly.

Then, I stood up, hugged her and said, “I gave you four of the five things (missing family) that are most important to you on your engagement.”

“Baby, it was perfect,” she cried towards me as we walked away from Spanish Plaza.

Almost finished…the hard part is over…just get to the hotel.

­915PM – I started walking her away from Spanish Plaza as she pulled out her Blackberry.

“I guess you saw my parents earlier, so that’s family…right…that’s five then?” She agreed. “Don’t you want to call your parents?”

“Oh yes!” she laughed like she’d forgotten about the whole world.

As she did that, I texted Caitlyn, “She said yes! On our way!”

“Oh, I guess they’re in bed by now,” she sighed.

“Yeah, I guess so.”

She then called her brother, Victor and her friend Star in Seattle. As she told her, she started crying immediately. Meanwhile, I was rushing us to the Café Adelaide because I wasn’t sure if everyone was finished eating.

Standing outside of the Lowe’s Hotel with the doormen staring at us, Heather continued to gab about something completely unrelated to marriage to Star.

Typical!! My heart was racing because I knew I was so close to completing the last step.

I was dragging her into the hotel and asking her to get off the phone. She finally told Star that she really had to go because of me.

As we turned into the bar of the hotel, Kim and Paul sat on the edge smiling. As soon as Heather saw Kim, she burst into tears for the third time. I reached over and shook Paul’s hand.

Almost there…only one more step to make this night perfect. Paul played it great like the night was already concluded. Kim was great in asking Heather if she wanted to go sit at their table in the back. Heather obliged.

Kim guided Heather to the back as Paul and I slowly pulled up the rear. Caitlyn was standing on the far side of the large table and snapped shots of Heather as she stopped dead in her tracks and cried for the fourth time. Her tears came from the six people (my family) she saw sitting at the table. She had failed to notice the other two. As she walked over toward Chenae (I think), she noticed the two other people at the table…her Mom and Dad. Heather’s tears turned to waterfalls.

Heather Seeing Her Parents

Heather Hugging Her Dad

Me Whispering to Her

She ran to them and hugged them aggressively. She then rushed to me to bury her head in my shoulder. I put my arm around her, put her ear to my lips and whispered, “Now, your family is here too. I gave you the five most important things. I love you baby.” She cried more and hugged me tight.

I pulled up a chair in between my mom and dad. I watched her enjoy herself with everyone seated at the table. Over our freshly poured Vodka-Sodas, we listened to everyone recount their stories of the planning over the previous 3 months. The topper was the “Proposal Agenda” I’d created for everyone that night.

Heather and My Parents

Heather and Her parents

The Agenda

The New Fam

Good Friends

Pure Joy

So, I’ve been engaged just over a week.  I know I’ve promised many of you a detailed version of the story via my blog.  First of all, thank you all so much for caring!  It’s great to know so many people have your best interests at heart.  Second, my plan was to do it this past weekend; however, viewing wedding sites is a more time consuming process than I thought.  Needless to say, after viewing 5 wedding sites spread all over metro Atlanta (drove over 300 miles in two days) and a soccer game on Sunday, I was quite worn down.  One thing I noticed is that looking at wedding sites starts to be like shopping for a suit…eventually, they all start looking alike.

The engagement story…it’s coming…I promise!

It’s been two years now since Katrina hit my town. I was just commenting to my best friend, now roommate, last night that I can’t believe it’s been 2 years since. I’m having trouble believing that it’s been a year since I wrote my last annual post! Last year I reflected on how much my life has changed in just 367 days. This year I’ve been forced to take on a more outside view of the city, since I’m only there about once a quarter on business.

As the news goes, people face fatigue with the stories that just can’t seem to go away. Katrina is one of these stories for many people. A huge frustration, still, for the people of the city is that only the negative media coverage seems to come out. Earlier this year, we had former medical professionals appear on a grand jury for possible euthanasia. Never mind, that they saved many other victims under extraordinary (literal sense) circumstances. It’s not like it was a typical day in the sun and they decided to just start killing people; but people tried to bring them down on such charges…unsuccessfully. I can still remember Anderson Cooper trying to cause controversy less than 3 weeks after the storm to get the mayoral candidates of Kenner in a shouting match for “news.” It makes me want to curse out the news channels like my Iraqi cab driving friend.

It’s been a rough year for politicians as well. At my last count, we’ve had 4 politicians indicted on federal charges…two at the national level and two at the local. The most upsetting for the locals was probably school board member Oliver Thomas because he was seen as the good and decent one, and I emphasize one, on the New Orleans school board. Just like anything else, there were probably many other politicians facing federal indictments in every state around the union; but we are under a microscope so everything counts.

Chris Rose, a writer for the Times Picayune who has gained much national recognition since Katrina due to his impressive writings, has had his book “1 Dead in Attic” now picked up and published by Simon and Schuster. We, the people of New Orleans, knew about our gem well before the storm. For me, Rose has been my source for the real happenings of the city from the outside. He pushes through all the clutter and let’s you know what’s truly down under the pile. Even Oprah has succumbed to the negative media. He has denied an appearance on Oprah today because they didn’t want to discuss his book…they want him to come on and talk about, “the mental health crisis” in New Orleans. I’m glad Rose denied the opportunity; but I’m sure Oprah will still create healthy dose of drama around the country for their 90% drama-craving audience. To the people of New Orleans the situation is a very real problem…to people around the country it’s a punchline or a good book.

The city of New Orleans focused fast on getting tourism up and running because it’s the bread and butter. I still become sad each time I fly in because there used to be 20 planes at a time there. and now I can count the number of direct flights per day on two hands. The airport looks almost identical at 9 in the morning as it does at 9 at night. It’s weird. Family and friends talk to me about happenings in the city like I’m just supposed to know what’s going on. In Atlanta, the only time I hear about New Orleans is if the Saints have done something or if something bad happens. I suspect it’s the same everywhere else.

And naturally after all of this, it comes back to crime. The crime that gets portrayed by national outlets is the same as it is in Chicago or Baghdad. People have to know where and when not to walk. The crime that should have been discussed was the level of increased teen violence in the suburbs due to parental displacement. That was/is the real problem. No one outside of the city has a clue though.

My company just hired a new VP from NYC. He expressed what the general overall feel of people up there is on us. Their mindset hasn’t changed since the storm happened. They look at it on paper and wonder what the hell we’re doing. He was very interested, as most are that find out I’m from New Orleans, to hear my view point. I liked that he was receptive and listened to me. He mentioned the sentiment of most New Yorkers. I mentioned 9-11. All of a sudden, he understood. All of sudden, the situation wasn’t on paper anymore.

I miss my city a whole bunch, and I miss my family that is still there like I was dying of thirst. They’re all still down there. Two siblings are at LSU, and the rest of my family is in the Big Easy. This year, I’ve had a slow dance with my older sister at my brother-in-law’s Bacchus Mardi Gras ball; I’ve had long conversations with my dad about doing what you have to do and staying mentally tough; the much-missed home cooked meals of my mother; the sense of pride watching my younger brother move up the depth chart on the LSU football team; my younger sister graduating from high school and moving to the next chapter in her life; my godson and niece growing in front of my eyes…becoming little people; a cup of Community Coffee with the mentors that were cultivating me to one day help be a leader in the community. It’s amazing how those events to me mean so much because their just samples of life; but to the people that see it every day, it is life. It really makes me have an appreciation for what this life is supposed to be about.

I know the Saints have been talked about so much as a miracle. I guess sometimes you just get lucky and those things happen. Although, we’ve suffered as fans for a little over thrity years, so I guess one day something good has to happen. I’ve heard ignorant comments about why do they care about football so much or that the Superdome is a waste of money. I think Tony Kornheiser said it best on the Monday night football game against the Atlanta Falcons last year, “If it’s important to the people of the city, then it should be important to us.” Sports give us an “out” and immediate gratification. I hope that the local teams do well this season, so the people have something to fall back on and unite.

In the big picture, I know that the people of the city will continue to move forward; and I hope that the people of this country will give us the time, chance and help to do what it takes to rebuild lives because it’s going to take all of those things coming together.

I ride in lots of cabs.  Yesterday, I’m in a cab from the Loop to Lakeview (Chicago).  At around 7, it’s a 15-20 minute cab ride.  I said hi to my driver when I jumped in with no response, so I jumped on my BB figuring it was going to be a quiet ride.  As we crossed over the Dearborn bridge to Wacker, he asked me where I was from.  He had a bit of an accent but his English was pretty good.  I lobbed the same question back to his court.  "Iraq," he said.  I have no doubt he’s had the conversation that was about to ensue with just about everyone in his cab for longer than 5 minutes.  I couldn’t resist, so I started with the family question.  He told me that his immediate family (wife and 3 kids) were here with him, but the rest of his family was still in Iraq.

I really didn’t have to ask too many more questions.   To my surprise, he elaborated and flowed from one topic to the next.  I made a few comments and small follow-up questions here and there, and other than a few bits of slang phrases he didn’t understand, the communication was great.  I could tell he was very happy here.

One of the first things he mentioned is how great this country is.  I travel often, and I hear this all the time from people who’ve moved here.  I hear it from people that moved out of the country for a time but then came back because they love it.  It makes me proud to be here because all I hear is the negative.  I’m always amazed how people take this country for granted.  Unfortunately, I think the only time I really take it all in is when I stand for the national anthem before any sporting event.  Thankfully, I go to many of them. 

For the most part, people really have no clue how much drama the media creates by not really painting an accurate picture of the world for us.  I always thought it but never truly realized it until I went through Katrina.  The media was and has been such a cause of frustration for people down there because they do a garbage job of reporting with accuracy.  My cab driver brought this up immediately.  As with most people that move to a new country, the first thing you learn is how to curse.  When I brought up the news, a few of these words came out.  It was a little humorous because he didn’t say them for effect.  He said them like they were a normal part of speech.

He told me that he has been here for 3 years now, and it’s the best decision he’s ever made.  His kids (ages 18, 16 and 12 I think they were) have a chance to survive.  They can walk outside at night.  His family in Iraq…not so much.  He said it’s like anything else…you just have to know where and when not to walk.  He explained to me the various sects of Iraqis, which was fascinating to me.  I hear it all the time on TV or magazine, but he gave me more accurate information in 5 minutes on each than I’ve received from any other outlet since the war began.  He was born in 1958.  He served during the war with Iran in 1989.  He is a civil engineer by trade and because of his degree they made him an officer, which he was clearly angered with.  He showed me where a bullet dispensed by an AK-47 caught him in the arm.   He said, "Let me rebuild the bridge after we destroy.  I don’t care about guns."  It was odd but I smiled because I knew what he was getting at.

I received this much useful information all before we hit the end of Lakeshore Drive.  As we turned off of LD, I finally had to ask, "So what is the view of people in Iraq on Americans and the war."  He said pretty much exactly what I was expecting to hear but I never hear on TV…an accurate portrayal.   He said his countrymen loved that we went in there at all cost to get Hussein out of Iraq.  He said he had seen women and children hung in front of the eyes of a husband and father for nothing more than a bad day at work.  He had seen men beaten to their death because they said hi to a woman on the street in a public place.  The country has been so happy to have him gone.  He said all sects are happy Hussein is gone but all for different reasons.  The big problem with the image of the war are the few idiots.  The suicide bombers and the roadside bombs cause the most noise in the US.  He got very passionate at this point because he mentioned that he could no longer watch TV because he never saw all the good that the US has done for them…only the bad.  I could see his eyes in the rear view mirror get deep and watered.  "Iraqis want the same thing Americans do," he said.  They needed help to get control of their country, but now they want to run their own country.  He said he understood how hard it was for the Americans to just leave.  Towards the end he probably said the most insightful thing.  "Americans are so used to having everything now. They don’t understand what it takes to breakdown and build up, so they think everything there is a mistake.  It’s not.  I would’ve never been able to come to this great country had they not invaded Iraq."

The last minute or so was small pleasantries.  I could have sat at the corner of Kenmore and Belmont for another hour listening to that.  I realize the man works on tips and he didn’t have to speak, but I don’t question the genuineness  of his viewpoint.  As I exited the cab, he offered his hand.  He shook mine vigorously and told me, "I love the US and am so happy to be here.  I wish you much luck my friend." 

"Congratulations on getting here.  I wish you continued success here and for your family," I said looking him dead in the eye. 

I paid $20 for that $14 cab ride.  I learned so much in just 15 minutes…it was worth every penny.

Last night, I watched my New Orleans Saints defeat the Philadelphia Eagles from a bar in Kansas City.  I was receiving text messages from my friend Doug while he was in the Superdome.  The whole bar was in the corner of New Orleans.  It was a nice little atmosphere.  The game was excellent playoff football.  Both teams showed resiliency which provided for a back and forth affair with few mistakes.  The atmosphere sounded electric over the TV so I can’t imagine how crazy it was next to 68,000 people that showed up.  I could only hear about it afterward.

My friend Doug called me to tell me about the game.  I asked him if the inside of the Dome was anything like the atmosphere during the Saints first playoff win in 2000 or the reopening of the Dome against the Falcons.  He said that the atmosphere was ten times as electric.  At the time, he had no idea where they were going out but that there was basically a pilgrimage of people headed to Bourbon Street from the Dome. 

My first football season away from home has been in Atlanta.  There aren’t too many people there cheering for the Saints during the season, so I’ve gotten a blurred image of what the rest of the country is thinking about the Saints.  Last night was evident to me that the entire country really is back the city of New Orleans.  And the Saints are making it easy for them because they illustrate a team effort.  The team oozes leadership from the top down.  Deuce McAllister was the man to display it last night.  He and the lineman pushing the pile over 5 yards for a touchdown yesterday just showed the heart and the faith that the team owns.

The Saints are in the NFC Championships for the first time in their history.  Chicago or Seattle…I don’t care…I just want to be fortunate enough to see this unit play together again.

Recently, I wrote about how new beginnings/traditions can be a cool thing which scares most of us.  At some level, we are all scared to get outside that little box in which we live.  The unknown has always had such a powerful aura to it.  Humans want to know but they don’t.  I can think of several common situations in life where this applies.  It all goes back to fear and wonder. 

Last year, I wrote about Christmas being so different because the things we were thankful for had changed so much due to Katrina.  This year was so different because life was all new.  New house…errr new place to live in an old house, new job for my dad and the new choices in colleges.  So much has changed in the past year for my family.  By far, the most has changed for my parents and younger sister.  The only thing my siblings and I really have to deal with at this point is how we can best make life easier on those three.

It was interesting watching everyone communicate under closer surroundings.  Our former house was very open and spread out, so everyone is used to being able to go and do their own thing if necessary.  The new place is much more close knit and intimate.  It is a little like living on a reality TV series…I think.  It’s just those little things we used to forget to be thankful for.  For instance having friends over used to require just going to another part of the house and now it’s required to schedule a room a finding a way to discuss things at a reasonable volume so as not to disturb others.  It’s going out with my friends in New Orleans and coming in late.  Whereas I used to be able to enter the house and get to my room without disturbing anyone.  This no longer exists.  I have to put force behind the front door to open it so that makes noise; and then, walking up the stairs echoes through the whole house so I walk carefully trying to be considerate of those sleeping.  It’s just plain interesting.  The family is adapting well though, and I’m happy to see it.

My dad began has been hard at his new job for a month now.  It’s been educational for me because I’ve grown up just watching him be the boss.  Now, he reports to someone else; but I think it’s what he really was looking for because it offers him a way to continue working without having to be sole responsible person.  He’s head of business development for an engineering firm.  So basically, he has returned to the roots of what he loves and what he’s good at…engineering and networking.  All he has to do is do what he loves and has no worries about other employees, etc. 

Interestingly enough the biggest stress relief as a result of the new house is the yard.  I’m sure everyone will relate to this on some level.  I’m convinced that one of the sole reasons my parents decided to have 4 children is because they knew they would need help around the house!  I remember growing up cleaning our yard on the weekend was an all day affair and my mom is anal about it…nothing was ever finished.  The yard used to require coordination, walkie-talkies and motivation.  Now, it just requires like 45 minutes and two people.  Honestly, between my mom, dad, younger brother and I at times we found ourselves standing around looking for things to do because sometimes there just isn’t enough yard.  I could see in everyone’s actions.  Each of use was looking for something else that could have been done, but there was nothing.  It’s kind of like that TV you have to move.  Yeah, two people would be nice, but it’s just easier to move by yourself.  I mentioned it and we all kind of laughed the situation.  I think that’s going to be the biggest stress relief on my parents…the yard and upkeep has been reduced by about 92%. 
Anyway, things are coming back into the city.  I was really glad to spend time with my friends and family.  I made the most of it and probably went out more in 10 days then I ever have in my life.  My dad has a new job, my mom is experiencing relief for the first time in a while, my younger sister is about to graduate and entertaining scholarship offers, my younger brother is now academic All-American for LSU football, my older sister’s family is doing outstanding and looking beautiful and I’m doing what I love in Atlanta. 

The city of New Orleans is coming back slowly but surely on so many fronts.  The city has Fleur-de-lis fever.  I guess things do happen for a reason…sometimes.

Black Friday is famously
known as the day after Thanksgiving melee of Christmas shopping sprees. Even though it sounds like a doomed day, it
is meant to be a win-win for everyone involved. Shopper save some cash on all their gifts, and the retailers go from red
to black.

For some of us, this day is
a real day of relaxation; since, for some, the Thanksgiving can involve lots of
traveling, organizing children and fake socializing with family members. It can be exhausting. The weekend from Thursday through Sunday is
downright a great football weekend. For
my family, it was nice as we saw the LSU Tigers knock off the Arkansas
Razorbacks and the New Orleans Saints once again dominate the Atlanta Falcons. However, the team that inspired me the most
on that weekend was my family.

For what seems to be about
the tenth time in the past fifteen months, we came together to help one another
get through a difficult time. The task
at hand that week was the help my parents move out of the house in which we
spent the past twenty years of our lives growing up. The house had become exactly what my parents
had wanted it to be. It was an open
house where everyone was always welcome. It was a place that their children and friends would always feel they had
a place no matter how far from they were. While it was something that was going to happen in the next three to
five years, the sudden forced nature of the sale left a bittersweet taste on
all of our palettes. The original plan
was for my parents to build a smaller house on a nearby lot and then sell the
current house as the time came. Hurricane Katrina has given us so many reality checks and this is just
one more.

So many times we think we
can control what goes on in the day to day. The more I look back at what has happened, the more I think how ridiculous
this notion is. I think the only thing
we really might be able to control is our character development which is built
on our reaction to life’s unforeseen circumstances. It’s like my friend Ian says, “Everything
happens for a reason so why worry?” Soon
after the Hurricane, I even called Ian out on it because I couldn’t understand
why all these things were just ‘meant to happen’ to my family, friends and all
the good people of
New Orleansthat I knew. I felt bad for putting Ian
on the spot as I did. It wasn’t the
right move, but I did make an effort to heed his word. While I think it’s oversimplified, many have
dispersed this knowledge. As a man, I
can tell you that this advice you used to literally make me angry. My older sister, Chenae, would always throw
that at me…especially after breaking up with a girl. Something I’ve noticed in my years on this
earth is that men usually need a reason (logic) to believe something more than
women. Women are much better with faith
than we are. I guess this leads men to
the false notion that we actually have a huge say-so in what goes on in our
lives. Anyway, after things had settled
a bit last year and had some actually time to truly reflect, I started to
realize maybe there is something to that way of thinking. I still worry often about things (because I
think too much anyhow) but nearly as much as I used to do.

One of the good things that
have come out the whole situation is that it has made us all less selfish and
more appreciating of what we have. I
think before the storm we (the kids) were secretly selfish in not wanting to
see the house we grew up in taken from us. We would listen to my parents talk about how it would just be too much
house to take care of without help, etc.; but I’m not quite sure we were really
listening. Well, we were after this
whole ordeal. If selling the house is
what it was going to take to release unnecessary stress from my parents’ lives,
then so be it. I think it was the
toughest at times on my younger sister, Caitlyn, because she is the last one
fully living under my parents’ roof; so on top of dealing with the job of being
a senior in high school she had to deal with not knowing where she’d be sleeping. I can definitely appreciate her
situation. If there was some family
badge of courage, I would probably give it to her. I’m sure she still had the typical teenage
hiccups with my parents, but I know for many kids they may not have been able
to handle everything with the temperament that she displayed.

It was odd sitting down for
dinner at Thanksgiving knowing that it would be the last time we all got
together for a meal or holiday in that house. I could see the emotion in my parents’ eyes as they noted how grateful
they were that everyone was back together in on e house one last time. The majority of my family lives nearby, but
Cole is at LSU and I now live in  Atlanta ;
so it’s rare that we are all together at once. I saw my father’s grasp on my mother’s shoulder tighten as he
spoke. Little things such as that always
seem to get to me. It amazes me that so
much emotion can exist in such a little physical motion.

The move took place over a
five day period. The goal was to squeeze
about 8,000 square feet of house into 3,000. For one of the few times in my life, my dad told me that he didn’t have
a backup plan. My dad is “Mr. Backup
Plan.” On top of everything else, this
left a dangling stress over everything else that was to happen over the next week
(moving to closing). It was, I guess,
the same as any other family move…highly stressful because there is so much to
move in so little time. My parents could
take their time unpacking, but the packing is the pain and it’s usually the
little things that hold things up. As we
moved boxes in, the house began to seemingly cave in. It was definitely going to be a lifestyle
adjustment for everyone. It’s going to
take awhile to get a lifetime unpacked. Again, Caitlyn would have the most to adjust to after all is done.

For the rest of the crew, it
shouldn’t be that hard. My older sister
has her house in town. I guess Cole and
I will just have to fight for the one extra bedroom when we’re in town. So basically that means I will be on the
couch, since he has about 5 inches and 100 pounds of muscle on me. My dog, Wyatt, will be in his fourth place in
the past year. I think he’s good as long
as he gets scratched periodically and the treats keep flowing.

I think for my parents
they’re glad it’s over. It’s so
bittersweet because I’m sure they would’ve like to build a smaller house than
just move. They still will build the
house but it may take a little time now. As I said, they would’ve just preferred to do things on their own terms.

The movers were there all
day Tuesday to help move the big stuff and boxes we’d packed. I touched down in Atlanta around eight that night. I spoke to Chenae. She said several friends came over to help my
mom finish up all the little things. I
think there may have been a few tears shed between friends. I’m so grateful for the great friends we
have…thank you. You made our lives
easier and more fulfilling.

My parents closed on the 30th. I’ll be driving home from Atlanta for Christmas and it will be to a
different house…weird. I have another
friend who told me how fun it is to begin new traditions. I’m looking forward to seeing the next major
chapter in our lives unfold!

My friend, Ian, recently made a post about how much affection we should show our families.  I thought the comments were quite interesting.  It’s neat to see how different cultures treat this subject.  You can check out his post here.

Bobby Knight doesn’t need me helping him defend himself.  He’ll throw a chair at me or slap me in the face.  That is quite alright with me.  I’ve seen this 8,000 times on ESPN.  I’m sure it’s aired everywhere else too.  Is this really that big of a crisis?  Michael Prince even said he had no problem with it.  Even his mom had no problem with it.  So why does everyone else?  The man needed his attention and he got it.  Knight was quoted as saying, "f I was confronted with the same set of circumstances I would do the exact same thing." 

I say, "Thank god we still have teachers in this world who are that passionate about making sure their kids understand what’s important in this world."  Development of character is one of those important things and that’s one of the reasons people send their kids to school.  More is learned in this world outside of books than inside of them.  The best teachers I had were the ones that brought personal insight to the class and didn’t just read off of Powerpoint decks all day.  I’ve discussed the importance of character before and the crippling that we are doing to the youth of this country.

Maybe it’s just the talking heads that have never been a part of a team before that don’t quite understand from where I come.

I voted yesterday for the first time since moving to Georgia.  It was a pleasant experience and I must say if every state was as efficient as this one, I don’t think there would ever be voter confusion. 

I watched the results early this morning as I dressed for work.  The power has shifted for sure in the House.  I’m not sure if they have called it yet in the Senate, but it looks like it’s headed that way.  However, I read yesterday’s Trendcentral report this morning.  The Intelligence Group asked 18-34 year olds what their take on the elections were.  The group was not trying to gauge the country but strictly this demographic.  I was quite curious to see how my peers discussed their views on politics, since we are usually portrayed as such an apathetic group. 

I was pleasantly surprised by some of the robust answers like Tom (24, Boston) and Alissa (20, Atlanta).  I was disappointed in the likes of Carrie (29, NYC) and Alan (25, Minneapolis).  I’m disappointed in answers such as these because they clearly point out what I discussed in my previous post; but they’re voting, so I’m happy about that.  Steve (28, Chicago) aggravates me not because of his answer, but of how valid his point about the portrayal of corruption is in both parties.  I would like to see people of our generation run to change this image.  I don’t hear much speak about it though.

Here is a copy of the article.

This morning I read the opinion page of the WSJ’s Personal Journal (email me for a copy) section.  Three opinions in a row caught my eye because they are all cross-sections of various problems in the US today.  They are things that annoy me (and probably most Americans today), but we only hear from the few that are affected by problems today.  It seems to be what sells in the media landscape.

Politics
In this piece, it is made quite clear how close minded and weak we have all become.  The first instance that someone disagrees with our views and they are written off.  The author makes a golden quote, "People come to dinner parties not with debating points but with
baseball bats. Bush is an idiot; Clinton is a liar — end of
conversation."
Unfortunately, it is never that easy.  We are now so inundated with things to make our lives easier that we rarely run across confrontation.  These changes are great, but they come with a price.  Basically, we are on a constant quest to customize our lives to where nothing disagrees with our views.  It cripples us.  As soon as someone disagrees, we write them off.  The result is these extreme camps of left, right and conspiracy theorists.  I remember studying the change of political parties in college.  It’s amazing how empathetic voters have become.  What’s more is that fewer people are identifying with a party because it’s now seen as extremism.  I think it’s sad because it has breeded absolute hate.’  You can’t like or dislike some of the President’s policies (Bush or Clinton), but you either have to hate or love him.  Even further, I hate and find it embarrassing the blatant disrespect we have now developed for people in positions of authority.  Don’t agree with someone…fine.  When did these extremest bumper stickers and t-shirts start.  Like "F the President."  I’m sorry, but things like that should only be said in times of dire hate.  I think it’s so sad.  People have threatened to leave the country.  Are you kidding me?  Go, please get the hell out.  You make us weak.  How about stepping up and doing something?  The people that do things like that are all talk.

Change for Few
The second piece was about the recent firing of Jane Fernandes, who was the provost at Gallaudet University (a deaf university).  She was accused of being an audist.  Yes, because she basically said that, "People that grow up in a hearing family has learning advantages to those that don’t."   The majority of people can hear and most things in this country are conducive to that.  We have excellent learning environments for people that have hearing disabilities.  Many people made great strides in the past to make sure these learning centers and schools were made available.  In my eyes, these people do their elders a disgrace because now they’re searching for something.  I think anyone who says that she doesn’t understand because she’s not one of them is diluted.  The woman is deaf.  She has been accused of not being ‘deaf enough.’  To me, that’s the equivalent of being, as the author states, of not being ‘black enough.’  I had a professor, that was black, in college tell us this in a class.  All of the white kids didn’t get it and all of the black kids got it and thought it was stupid.  I have  feeling most of the deaf people in this world feel the same and are embarrassed.  Of course, instead of the board taking a stand, they fired her.  We’re so unbelievably sensitive. 

Sex…
…Austin Powers once said, "Yes, please."  Not that kind, I’m talking about gender here.  This piece was written by Christine Whelan.  She is a young writer that just released a book called, "Why Smart Men Marry Smart Women."  I haven’t read the book yet, but the subject matter is long overdue.  It basically shows the various reasons why marriage is not in decline, but people are waiting longer and making smarter decisions about who they marry.  The ideas of the past (think Sex and the City…which I love) is that men are threatened by successful women.  I have long thought, and she proves, it that this is bogus.  It may have been true for the generation of men that had to adapt to that change during an era when women really started to make their strides.  However, I have to think that this has not been the mainstream thinking by men in 20 probably closer to 30 years at least.  Many relationships that I witness (good and bad) all want the best for their spouse.   If the relationship is good, then who cares who makes the most money.  If it’s good, it won’t matter.  The women that feel this way are either insecure or experiencing it.  The men that are doing this are insecure….get over it.  Both genders have their strengths and weaknesses, so focus on them together.  Again, I feel that the majority of men and women get this.  I think it’s the minority of people that make us all look bad.

Summary
I get annoyed with how soft we’ve become.  I’m not an old person from an older generation.  I’m 25 and very much in the mix.   I look at my nephew’s (age 7) sporting events.  They don’t keep score and everyone gets a trophy.  It’s just a microcosm of our society…so, so sad.  Good experiences are great, but we become better people through the strengthening of character.  We usually learn more from the bad stuff than the good.  We’re crippling ourselves.  Right now, America’s brand is less than average.  I don’t blame Bush because it was low before he took office.  That was huge reason for 9/11.  We are not at the point of no return to be great again.   How long will it be before we get so extreme that we begin to hurt one another physically? 

I thank you for reading.  Call me if you want to grab some coffee so we can intelligently discuss opposing viewpoints.  Or, please feel free to bash me and tell me how much you hate me.  I look forward to the blatant disrespect.

I‘ve written often about how important it is to me to always keep in mind the things I truly value and let those be my guide.  I use the term ‘things’ loosely because I don’t mean it to point to material things.   Anyway, I am human and it’s not possible to always keep in mind those things during the actions that lead down  your path; but it is possible to do so before you go down that path or sub-path.  For instance, the job I recently undertook.  The only part that was about money was that I had enough to live.  I had higher priorities like personal growth in the industry.  The new company offered much more of this than my previous one.  So, I jumped on it.*

Recently, Tiki Barber has made it known that he will probably retire at season’s end.  The Barbers (Tiki with the Giants and Ronde with the Bucs) have always seemed to be a class duo of brothers.  Tiki often talks of how he has always been off the radar, but always made sure to take advantage of the opportunities presented to him.  He attributes that mentality to his overall success.  Even as powerful of a force as he is now, the man still flies under the radar for the most part.  The only people that tend to know his value are fantasy geeks and NFL personnel.  He is at the top of his game right now and he will most likely be leaving.  It’s not about money and it’s not about playing time.  It’s about having options.  In the shadows of Barry Sanders and Robert Smith, Tiki has heeded the advice of doctors and family.  He has clearly defined that he has several points in his life that he needs to accomplish.  His long-term health is one of them. 

I wish I could shake his hand to tell him how proud I am of him, but in reality, it’s what we’re supposed to do as people.  So, why would I congratulate someone for doing something they’re supposed to do.  I would never shake someone’s hand for opening the door for a woman or helping a child learn how to read.  Those are things we’re supposed to do.  Unfortunately, those things seem like novel ideas in today’s world.  We’ve become so robotic and P.C. that we have become scared to act on the things we should do.

I would love to hear guys like Tiki speak to young men and women in high school about money not being everything…about striving to do your best in everything but for the right reasons.  The NFL has a mentoring program fro rookies coming into the league.  Guys like this need to be part of that program to teach them that options are important because one day the game will leave them.  And as invincible as we think we are at 25, some things like getting older we can’t control.  We can control being dynamic enough to always have options.

Big ups to Mr. Barber for going out on top.  Most athletes can’t do it.  It’s hard to leave what you spend your life crafting.  It’s hard to begin that new journey.  But, no congratulations to Mr. Barber on doing what you’re supposed to do.  You’re just human.


*I apologize to my readers for the lack of posts recently.  It’s been a busy transition process to my new position.  I will step it back up.